It is recommended that the person initiating the greeting says: “As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakātuh” (Peace be upon you and the mercy of Allah and His blessings). He uses the plural pronoun even if he is greeting one person. The greeted person should reply saying: “Wa ‘alaykum as-salām wa rahmatullahi wa barakātuh” (And upon you be peace and the mercy of Allah and His blessings). So he starts with the conjunction 'wa' (which means 'and').
851/1 - ‘Imrān ibn al-Husayn (may Allah be pleased with him and his father) reported: “A man came to the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) and said: ‘Peace be upon you.’ The Prophet responded to his greeting and the man sat down, then the Prophet said: ‘Ten.’ Then another man came and said: ‘May the peace and mercy of Allah be upon you.’ The Prophet replied to his greeting and the man sat down, then the Prophet said: ‘Twenty.’ Then another man came and said: ‘May the peace, mercy, and blessings of Allah be upon you.’ The Prophet replied to his greeting and the man sat down, then the Prophet said: ‘Thirty.’” [Narrated by Abu Dāwūd and Al-Tirmidhi, who classified it as Hasan (sound)]
1) The longer the greeting of peace used by a person, according to the Sunnah, the greater the reward.
2) It encourages us to reap great rewards for simple deeds. This comes from the bounty and grace of Allah towards His believing servants.
852/2 - ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said to her: “This is Jibrīl (Gabriel) giving you the greeting of peace.” I said: “And may peace be upon him and the mercy of Allah and His blessings.” [Narrated by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim]
In some of the versions reported by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim, it comes with “and His blessings of”, and other versions do not have this part. An addition made by trustworthy reporters is accepted.
1) When a person conveys the greeting of peace from one to another, it is Sunnah to say to him: “And peace be upon you,” or “Peace be upon you and him.” This is because the person conveying the greeting has done something good so you reward him by supplicating in his favor.
2) If a person is asked to convey the greeting of peace to someone and he commits to it, it becomes a trust and he must convey it. {Indeed, Allah commands you to render trusts to whom they are due} If he does not commit to it, however, then he is under no obligation to convey it.
3) It shows the merit of ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her), as the noblest of all angels sent her the greeting of peace through the noblest of all messengers.
853/3 - Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: “Whenever the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) spoke a word, he would repeat it thrice until it is understood from him. And whenever he greeted a group of people, he would greet them thrice.” [Narrated by Al-Bukhāri]
This is taken to refer to the case when there is a large gathering.
1) The Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) was keen to deliver everything good to his Ummah and was compassionate towards them.
2) A believer should address people in the manner that suits their level of understanding and find excuses for them.
854/4 - Al-Miqdād (may Allah be pleased with him) reported in a long Hadīth: “We used to set aside for the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) his share of milk, and he would come at night and offer greetings of peace in a tone that did not disturb those who were asleep but was heard by those who were awake. So (one night), the Prophet came and gave greetings of peace as he used to greet... ” [Narrated by Muslim]
1) It shows the Prophet’s perfect guidance and his mercy towards the believers. His greeting would be heard by those awake and not disturb those asleep.
2) There should be no harm nor reciprocation of harm; an Islamic rule.
855/5 - Asmā bint Yazīd (may Allah be pleased with her) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) passed through the mosque one day while a group of women were sitting there, so he moved his hand with the greeting of peace. [Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi; he classified it as Hasan (sound)] [1]
This is taken to mean that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said and signaled the greeting, which is supported by another version narrated by Abu Dāwūd in which it is reported: “so he gave us the greeting of peace.”
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1) It is forbidden to give the greeting only with the hand, without saying it verbally, for this resembles the manner of the Jews and Christians, from whom we are commanded to differ.
2) It is permissible to greet women when temptation is not feared. But when a woman is alone, it is not permissible for an unrelated man to greet her, for fear of temptation.
3) That the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) would differ from the People of the Book is one of the rites of Islam. This includes the greeting of peace. So where are Muslims from this great principle?
856/6 - Abu Jurayy al-Hujaymi (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: I went to the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) and said: “Upon you be peace, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “Do not say ‘Upon you be peace’, for this is the greeting to the dead.”
[Narrated by Abu Dāwūd and Al-Tirmidhi, who classified it as Hasan Sahīh (sound and authentic). It has previously been cited in its entirety]
1) It urges us to teach the ignorant what they do not know about and alert the person who uses the wrong wording to the correct wording prescribed in the Shariah.
2) It shows the manner of saying the greeting to the dead in their graves; it is: “‘Alayka as-salām” (Upon you be peace). This is addressed to someone who is absent yet near. However, the Sunnah also indicates that it is permissible to greet the dead with the words “Salāmun ‘alaykum ahl ad-diyār” (Peace be upon you, O inhabitants of the dwellings). So, the greeting is the same to the living and the dead.