Allah Almighty says: {Men are in charge of women, as Allah has made some of them excel the others, and because they spend of their wealth. Therefore the righteous women are obedient, and protect what Allah has entrusted them with in [their husband’s] absence} [Surat an-Nisā’: 34]
Allah -Ta'ālā- berfirman, "Laki-laki (suami) itu pemimpin bagi perempuan (istri), karena Allah telah melebihkan sebagian mereka (laki-laki) atas sebagian yang lain (perempuan), dan karena mereka (laki-laki) telah memberikan nafkah dari hartanya. Maka perempuan-perempuan yang saleh, adalah mereka yang taat (kepada Allah) dan menjaga diri ketika (suaminya) tidak ada, karena Allah telah menjaga (mereka)." (QS. An-Nisā`: 34)
1) Men are in charge of women because of what Allah Almighty has assigned to them of special tasks, one of which is that the man is responsible for providing for the woman.
1) Laki-laki adalah pemimpin bagi perempuan, karena Allah -Ta'ālā- telah mengistimewakan mereka dengan hal itu. Juga karena laki-laki yang memberi nafkah kepada perempuan.
2) A woman’s honor lies in staying at her home, whereby she keeps her husband’s secrets, guards in his absence what Allah Almighty ordered her to guard, and devotes herself to worshiping her Lord and obeying her husband.
2) Kemuliaan perempuan ada di rumahnya, yaitu dia menjaga rahasia suaminya serta menjaga diri ketika suaminya tidak ada karena Allah -Ta'ālā- menjaga mereka, merutinkan ibadah kepada Rabb-nya, dan taat kepada suaminya.
they include the Hadīth of ‘Amr ibn al-Ahwas mentioned in the previous chapter.
di antaranya hadis 'Amr bin Al-Aḥwaṣ yang telah disebutkan di bab sebelumnya.
281/1- Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “If a man invites his wife to his bed and she refuses, and so he spends the night angry with her, the angels will curse her until the morning.” [Narrated by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim]
1/281- Abu Hurairah -raḍiyallāhu 'anhu- meriwayatkan, Rasulullah -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- bersabda, "Jika seorang suami mengajak istrinya ke tempat tidurnya, lalu istrinya menolak sehingga si suami melalui malam itu dalam keadaan marah kepadanya, maka malaikat melaknat istri itu hingga pagi." (Muttafaq ‘Alaih)
In another narration by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim: “If a woman spends the night deserting her husband’s bed, the angels curse her until the morning.”
Dalam riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim yang lain: "Apabila seorang wanita bermalam sementara ia tidak memenuhi ajakan suaminya di tempat tidur, maka malaikat melaknatnya hingga pagi."
In another version, the Messenger of Allah (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “By Him in Whose Hand my soul is, when a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, the One Who is in the heaven becomes displeased with her until he (her husband) becomes pleased with her.”
Dalam riwayat yang lain, Rasulullah -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- bersabda, "Demi Allah yang jiwaku berada di Tangan-Nya! Tidaklah seorang suami mengajak istrinya ke ranjang lalu dia menolak, melainkan yang ada di langit murka kepadanya sampai suaminya memaafkannya."
The angels curse her: they invoke Allah that she be cursed, meaning that she be expelled and excluded from Allah’s mercy.
"Malaikat melaknatnya" yaitu, malaikat berdoa memohonkan laknat untuk perempuan tersebut. Laknat ialah pengusiran dan penjauhan dari rahmat Allah.
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تَأْبىٰ (ta`bā): ia menolak.
1) The Hadīth provides explicit proof of the view held by Ahl-us-Sunnah wa al-Jamā‘ah that Allah Almighty is in the heaven, established upon His Throne which is above the seven heavens. This is supported by texts of the Shariah as well as scholarly consensus.
1) Ia adalah dalil yang tegas bagi pendapat Ahli Sunah wal Jamaah, bahwa Allah -'Azza wa Jalla- di atas langit, berada di atas Arasy-Nya. Arasy Allah ada di atas tujuh langit, sebagaimana hal ini ditunjukkan oleh nas syariat dan ijmak.
2) The Hadīth highlights the great right a husband has over his wife; a right that is further emphasized when the husband is properly observing the rights of his wife.
2) Menjelaskan besarnya hak suami atas istrinya, dan hak ini semakin kuat bagi suami yang menunaikan hak istrinya.
3) A stern warning for the woman against incurring the displeasure of Allah Almighty and the curse of the angels if she refuses to accept her husband’s invitation to bed with the purpose of disobedience and rebellion that lack a Shariah-approved reason.
3) Peringatan terhadap murka Allah -Ta'ālā- serta laknat malaikat terhadap perempuan yang menolak ajakan suaminya ke tempat tidur karena membangkang dan durhaka tanpa sebab yang dibenarkan syariat.
282/2- Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) also reported that Allah’s Messenger (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “It is not lawful for a woman to fast while her husband is present without his permission, nor to admit anyone into his house without his permission.” [Narrated by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim; this is the wording narrated by Al-Bukhāri]
2/282- Juga dari Abu Hurairah -raḍiyallāhu 'anhu-, bahwa Rasulullah -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- bersabda, "Tidak halal bagi seorang wanita untuk berpuasa (sunah) sedang suaminya ada kecuali dengan seizinnya. Dan tidak boleh memberi izin (orang masuk) di rumah suaminya kecuali dengan seizinnya." (Muttafaq 'Alaih, dan ini redaksi Bukhari)
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شَاهِدٌ (syāhid): hadir, ada.
1) When the husband is absent, it is permissible for the wife to fast as she wishes.
1) Bila suami tidak ada maka seorang perempuan boleh berpuasa sesukanya.
2) A husband should manage his household affairs according to what is commonly acceptable; he may ban those whose presence in his house might be a source of harm.
2) Suami memimpin istrinya menurut cara yang makruf; dia boleh melarang siapa yang dikhawatirkan kedatangannya akan membawa keburukan di rumah tangganya.
Is the ruling concerning voluntary prayers the same as that of voluntary fasting, in terms of the necessity of the husband’s permission?
Apakah hukum salat sunah sama seperti puasa sunah, harus ada izin suami?
Scholars said that voluntary prayers is different form fasting because the time during which the prayer is offered is short, unlike fasting that consumes the whole daytime. So, the wife may offer voluntary prayers when her husband is present, unless he prevents her. However, a husband should not deprive his wife of doing what is good, instead, he should urge her to do it.
Para ulama berkata, "Salat sunah tidak seperti puasa. Karena waktu salat pendek. Ini berbeda dengan puasa yang dilakukan sepanjang siang. Sehingga seorang wanita boleh melakukan salat walaupun suaminya ada, kecuali kalau dia melarangnya. Tetapi, seharusnya seorang suami tidak menghalangi istrinya dari amalan kebaikan. Bahkan dia harus menyemangatinya."
Permission for admitting others into one’s house is of two kinds:
Izin memasukkan orang ke rumah terbagi dua:
- Conventional permission: that is common among people and compliant with their traditions, like the case of female neighbors and relatives and the like entering the house.
- Izin menurut kebiasaan; yaitu kebiasaan dan budaya masyarakat, seperti masuknya istri tetangga, kerabat, dan semisalnya.
- Verbal permission: when the husband says to his wife that she may admit whoever she wishes into the house except those whose presence might incur harm. Here the matter is dependent upon his permission.
- Izin secara ucapan, misalnya suami berkata, "Masukkan siapa saja yang kamu kehendaki, kecuali orang yang kamu lihat berbahaya maka jangan dimasukkan." Jika demikian, maka perkara ini harus mengikuti izinnya.
283/3- Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him and his father) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian of her husband’s house and his children; so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects.” [Narrated by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim]
3/283- Ibnu Umar -raḍiyallāhu 'anhumā- meriwayatkan dari Nabi -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam-, bahwa beliau bersabda, "Semua kalian adalah pemimpin, dan semua kalian akan ditanya tentang apa yang dipimpinnya. Seorang amir adalah pemimpin, laki-laki adalah pemimpin untuk keluarganya, wanita adalah pemimpin di rumah suami dan anak-anaknya. Jadi setiap kalian adalah pemimpin, dan semua kalian bertanggung jawab atas yang dipimpinnya." (Muttafaq ‘Alaih)
A guardian is the caretaker who guards the interests of his wards and makes them accessible to them, and spots the evils and wards them off.
الرَّاعِي (ar-rā'ī): orang yang mengurus sesuatu (pemimpin), yaitu memperhatikan kemaslahatannya serta mempersiapkannya dan memperhatikan yang membahayakannya lalu menjauhkannya.
1) The speech is addressed to all the Muslim Ummah. The Messenger of Allah (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) explains in it the categories of responsibility that should be discharged in order to realize interests.
1) Hadis ini ditujukan untuk semua umat Islam. Di dalamnya Rasulullah -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- menerangkan tingkatan tanggung jawab yang wajib ditunaikan demi mewujudkan kemaslahatan.
2) The responsibility of guardians vary between large expansive responsibilities and small limited ones.
2) Para pemimpin berbeda tingkat kepemimpinannya, antara tanggung jawab besar dan luas dan tanggung jawab yang kecil dan sempit.
3) A husband has a great right over his wife that she is obligated to fulfill.
3) Besarnya hak suami atas istrinya, dan wajib ditunaikan oleh istri.
284/4- Abu ‘Ali Talq ibn ‘Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Messenger of Allah (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “If a man calls his wife to fulfill his need, she should come to him even if she is busy at the oven.” [Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi and Al-Nasā’i; Al-Tirmidhi classified it as Hasan Sahīh (sound and authentic)]
4/284- Abu Ali Ṭalq bin Ali -raḍiyallāhu 'anhu- meriwayatkan, bahwa Rasulullah -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- bersabda, "Apabila seorang suami mengajak istrinya kepada hajatnya, maka ia harus memenuhinya walaupun sedang memasak di depan tungku api." (HR. Tirmizi dan An-Nasā`iy; Tirmizi berkata, "Hadisnya hasan sahih")
285/5- Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “If I were to order anyone to prostrate himself before another, I would have ordered the wife to prostrate herself before her husband.” [Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi; he classified it as Hasan Sahīh (sound and authentic)]
5/285- Abu Hurairah -raḍiyallāhu 'anhu- meriwayatkan dari Nabi -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam-, bahwa beliau bersabda, "Andaikan aku boleh memerintah seseorang untuk bersujud kepada orang lain, niscaya aku akan memerintahkan seorang istri agar bersujud kepada suaminya." (HR. Tirmizi dan dia berkata, "Hadisnya hasan sahih")
To fulfill his need: this may refer to any need in general or to the man’s need to fulfill his sexual lust for his wife.
حَاجَتُهُ (ḥājatuhu): hajat suami memenuhi syahwatnya pada istrinya. Tetapi juga ada kemungkinan bahwa maksudnya adalah hajat suami secara umum.
Oven (Ar. Tannūr): the place where baking is done.
التَّنُّوْر (at-tannūr): dapur membuat roti.
1) The Hadīth lays great emphasis on the obligation for a woman to obey her husband even in the hardest circumstances.
1) Penegasan tentang kewajiban perempuan untuk segera melakukan ketaatan kepada suaminya, walaupun dalam kondisi yang paling sulit.
2) The Shariah blocked the way before men from being tempted by other women, so it made the wife lawful to her husband and urged her to obey him.
2) Syariat menutup pintu fitnah perempuan bagi laki-laki, sehingga syariat menghalalkan istrinya baginya serta menganjurkan istri tentang kewajiban menaatinya.
3) The husband’s right over his wife is a great one, and the wife is encouraged to obey her husband according to what is acceptable.
3) Menjunjung hak suami serta menganjurkan istri untuk taat kepada suaminya menurut cara yang makruf.
286/6- Um Salamah (may Allah be pleased with her) reported that the Messenger of Allah (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Any woman who dies while her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise.” [Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi; he classified it as Hasan (sound)] [2]
6/286- Ummu Salamah -raḍiyallāhu 'anhā- meriwayatkan, Rasulullah -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- bersabda, "Wanita mana saja yang meninggal dunia sedangkan suaminya rida kepadanya maka dia akan masuk surga." (HR. Tirmizi dan dia berkata, "Hadisnya hasan") [2].
1) Obeying the husband is a reason for entering Paradise.
1) Taat kepada suami merupakan sebab masuk surga.
2) The Shariah honors the woman by assigning to her a deed that would earn her Paradise if she were patient and obeyed her husband according to what is acceptable.
2) Islam memuliakan perempuan, yaitu dengan menyiapkan baginya sebuah amalan yang dengan sebabnya dia akan masuk surga bila dia bersabar dan taat menurut yang makruf.
3) If a husband dies while he is displeased with his wife, she is in grave danger and threatened with punishment.
3) Bila seorang suami meninggal dunia sementara dia tidak rida kepada istrinya, niscaya istrinya berada dalam bahaya besar yang diancam dengan siksa.
287/7- Mu‘ādh ibn Jabal (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whenever a woman harms her husband in this world, his wife from the Houris of Paradise says: Do not harm him! May Allah destroy you! He is but a passing guest with you, and he will soon leave you to join us.” [Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi; he classified it as Hasan (sound)]
7/287- Mu'āż bin Jabal -raḍiyallāhu 'anhu- meriwayatkan dari Nabi -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam-, bahwa beliau bersabda, "Tidaklah seorang istri menyakiti suaminya di dunia melainkan calon istrinya di akhirat dari kalangan bidadari akan berkata, 'Janganlah kamu menyakitinya! Semoga Allah mencelakakanmu. Sesungguhnya ia hanya sementara berkumpul denganmu. Sebentar lagi ia meninggalkanmu menuju kami.'" (HR. Tirmizi dan dia berkata, "Hadisnya hasan")
1) The Houris rebuke the woman who abuses her husband in the worldly life, which indicates the gravity of disobedience.
1) Bidadari surga mencela perempuan yang menyakiti suaminya di dunia; ini adalah dalil bahayanya tidak menaati suami.
2) The spouses are urged to maintain good companionship, because the worldly life is but a passage to the Hereafter, not an abode of eternal residence.
2) Anjuran kepada para suami dan istri agar saling bergaul dengan baik, karena dunia ini hanyalah negeri sementara, bukan negeri abadi.
288/8/ - Usāmah ibn Zayd (may Allah be pleased with him and his father) reported that the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) said: “I am not leaving a trial behind me that is more harmful to men than women.” [Narrated by Al-Bukhāri and Muslim]
8/288- Usāmah bin Zaid -raḍiyallāhu 'anhumā- meriwayatkan dari Nabi -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam-, bahwa beliau bersabda, "Tidaklah aku meninggalkan fitnah yang paling berbahaya bagi laki-laki melebihi wanita." (Muttafaq 'Alaih)
1) The Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) informed about this trial in order to warn men against being tempted by women.
1) Berita tentang fitnah yang disampaikan oleh Nabi -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- ini sebenarnya sebagai peringatan terhadap fitnah wanita.
2) All the ways that lead to falling into temptation by women are to be blocked. The prohibition of intermixing between the two sexes is an example of that.
2) Menutup semua celah yang akan menyebabkan seorang laki-laki terfitnah dengan wanita, di antaranya pengharaman ikhtilāṭ (campur-baur) antara laki-laki dan perempuan.
Allah Almighty says: {The love of desirable things has been made appealing to people, such as women, children, hoarded heaps of gold and silver, branded fine horses, livestock, and tilled land} [Surat Āl ‘Imrān: 14] All of these things were made appealing to people in this world and have become a source of temptation to them. However, the most severe temptation is that of women, and that is the reason why Allah Almighty mentions them first in that context, as He says: {The love of desirable things has been made appealing to people, such as women... }
- Allah -Ta'ālā- telah berfirman, "Dijadikan terasa indah dalam pandangan manusia cinta terhadap apa yang diinginkan, berupa wanita-wanita, anak-anak, harta benda yang bertumpuk dalam bentuk emas dan perak, kuda pilihan, hewan ternak, dan sawah ladang." (QS. Āli 'Imrān: 14) Semua yang disebutkan ini termasuk yang dijadikan indah bagi manusia di dunia dan menjadi sebab mereka terfitnah. Tetapi yang paling berat adalah fitnah wanita. Oleh karena itu, Allah memulai dengan penyebutannya. Allah berfirman, "Dijadikan terasa indah dalam pandangan manusia cinta terhadap apa yang diinginkan, berupa wanita-wanita ..."
- Some men misunderstand these Hadīths and therefore tyrannize their wives and abuse them. They fail to realize that the Hadīths are not meant for allowing them to treat their wives unjustly and wrongfully, but rather that they must be fair and just, return the kind treatment with its like, and fulfill the rights due upon them {Women have rights similar to the rights over them in a reasonable manner, although men have a higher degree [of responsibility] over them} [Surat al-Baqarah: 228] A wise husband builds his relationship with his wife on a basis of affection and mercy, and forgiveness and giving advice so that he would attain success and goodness. He should take the prophetic household as a role model in this regard and assume the manners of the Prophet (may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him) with his wives and family members; and Allah is the One who grants success.
- Sebagian laki-laki salah memahami hadis-hadis ini sehingga dia bersikap keras dan menyakiti istrinya. Dia tidak tahu bahwa hadis-hadis ini tidak membukakannya jalan untuk berbuat zalim. Bahkan, dia harus bersikap adil dan proporsional kepada istrinya, agar dia bergaul bersamanya dengan baik, serta menunaikan hak-hak istri yang harus dia tunaikan: "Dan mereka (para perempuan) mempunyai hak seimbang dengan kewajibannya menurut cara yang patut. Tetapi para suami, mempunyai kelebihan di atas mereka." (QS. Al-Baqarah: 228) Suami yang cerdas akan membangun hubungannya bersama istrinya di atas cinta dan kasih sayang serta lapang dada dan ketulusan, agar dia dapat meraih kesuksesan dan kesalehan. Yang menjadi teladannya dalam masalah itu adalah rumah tangga Nabi serta hubungan antara beliau -ṣallallāhu 'alaihi wa sallam- bersama istri dan keluarganya. Semoga kita semua dimudahkan oleh Allah dalam menjalaninya.